Letters ex Utero

Dear Baby, I’m just writing to check that everything’s ok, and that you’re comfortable and eat well. Can you sleep? I know it’s noisy in there and you have a lot of work to do so I guess things are not always easy. Your mother caught a cold recently and you must have felt some of the coughing, but she’s been very careful and treated it at once. This is almost over by now, and with the sunny days ahead I think a cold is unlikely to come back. We know you’re doing very well anyway because we can kind of see you with sonograms and we do lots of indirect measures and your mother’s belly has been nicely expanding. But it would be great to have direct confirmation from you when you find the time. Your birth will be the coronation of this summer, let me know if I can do anything to help.

Dear Daddy, I’m sorry I didn’t write before. At first it was mostly because I lacked a nervous system, and now it’s because I’m very busy building one. You’re right that it’s a lot of work, I mean at times I’m building more than 250 000 neurons a minute - yes that’s a quarter of a million!  But please know that everything is fine here and Maman has designed a great place for me. 

From the very early days I decided to send some of my dividing cells in a delegation, to ask if they could connect to Maman. She has agreed, and our cells merged into a neat little thing through which she’s transiting food and oxygen in just the right proportions. Apparently you people of the outside world strangely insist on eating only a few times in the day, but this is really not the way we do it in here, so we’re very proud of this gadget since it actually regulates the flow. It’s also a filter that keeps harmful things away, you know, like the virus that Mamam has caught. I did feel her cough though, and I hope she’ll get better soon. 

Oh also before I forget, it’s always nice when you talk to me, but you should know that I can’t really distinguish the sounds from the background noise of the intestines –sorry, these are sooo loud! However I do feel some pressures when you pass your hand over Maman’s belly. 

Well that is, when I’m not sleeping. It’s hard to tell without a clock or anything, but I think I’m sleeping at least one fourth of the time. This week was a tough one (although nothing like the first weeks of course). I managed to put my ears at the appropriate location, and to make some real progress with my genitals, which are nearly completed (I promise that next time you try a sono I won't be sitting on my knees, so as to let you see). I’m also beginning to warp my nervous fibers in myelin since I’m told it helps neurons to talk faster. This is quite an assignment and I gather it will take me many months. But I’m not complaining, the place is great and Maman feeds me well.

Talk soon !